"Can I Change My Mind?"

Wrapped up in fur. Lost transmissions in the darkness. I'm happy to see you. Even if you were just using me, it would have been nice to know. Sometimes i forget myself and take others to the place i want to be the most. I hope you were happy for a couple of hours. It's hard to keep it all together when the world constantly flashes across your eyes. It's hard keeping the noise out. Most of the time i think i'm going insane. It's not fair to not know what to do with myself. I can't help this desire to exist in a certain time and space, without anything to hold on to. I could even go as far as to say that i'm afraid of myself. I wish you would understand. I wish i could want to take it all back, but it's not in my nature to feel that way. Picking myself up from the ashes, i know i was never made for you love, your respect. Bite me, taste me, chew me, spit me out. I'll be be your keeper of secrets. I will be your silence. I do not see an end to this. I'm trapped in my own darkness and so are you. You just haven't realised it yet. I'll save you if you'd let me. I could try.  ¶ 10/02/2005 09:41:00 PM